


A Broken Home

by Keelynoelle



Category: Undertale
Genre: Angst, Big Brother Sans, Broken Family, Depression, Minor Character Death, bad dadster, gaster doesn't know how to take care of kids, neglectful father, unbetad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-02
Updated: 2016-09-02
Packaged: 2018-08-12 12:41:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,830
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7934953
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Keelynoelle/pseuds/Keelynoelle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff"><p>So this started as a request to have Papyrus give Sans a father day gift and neglectful Gaster see it. But, I ended up not even use that part since it turned into a mini novel. I need to learn to chill....</p><p>Sorry for any errors.</p></blockquote>





	A Broken Home

Gaster enjoyed his work. He loved it, he always had. He was always fond of math and science as a child and as the years went by that curiosity only grew. He graduated years above the rest of his class but his thrive to learn more never stopped. Degree after degree Gaster studied and worked never really expecting to get anywhere with it but just because he wanted to. Gaster found it fun. He loved spending weekends indoors reading about quantum physics and he adored quizzing himself about chemical equations. When Gaster was offered the position of Royal Scientist he accepted immediately. Why? The knowledge. With that kind of title, he'd have access to all sort of restricted documents and data that made his body vibrate at the thought of reading them.

Gaster's enthusiasm only grew when he was given his own lab and pile of things that needed to be solved. He was given a team but Gaster rarely talked to them. He often handed them his finished work and told them to get to work and they always marveled at what he thought was simple equations. Asgore always had requests and things he wished to improve upon in his world that Gaster couldn't wait to solve. Maintaining the temperature in all the lands, the core, and Gaster's personal favorite the souls. Oh stars, he couldn't get enough of them. They held so many mysteries, so many new discoveries to be explored. But he needed to be careful. So very careful. Asgore trusted Gaster with the souls but Gaster trusted no one else with them. His team was never allowed near them and the scientist kept all records and data on them in his personal lab.

The only other monster to get close to his research was Gaster's son Sans. It had been an accident, his child's nosey behavior, and gifted magic often got him in a lot of trouble and this was no exception. But it wasn't his fault entirely. Gaster wasn't...fatherly. He dare say he never even wanted children or imagined himself having any. He also never imagined himself married either and he certainly never foresaw himself a widower either. Gaster had agreed to have children for the sake of his wife. She had been at home often and with Gaster so engaged with his work, she was lonely. With a child, she'd be happy and Gaster would feel the guilt that often ate at him shrink away knowing his wife wouldn't have to eat dinner alone or fall asleep in an empty bed.

When Sans was born Gaster didn't feel like a father. Asgore had spoken for hours of the joy of children and fatherhood but Gaster only wished he'd stop talking so he could focus on why the third-floor power in the core stopped working.

Gaster's wife took care of Sans pretty much all day. Gaster didn't know the first thing about a child or how to raise one. Still, Sans always craved his attention and would giggle and cry out for his father whenever he arrived home. Gaster tried his best to be something even remotely close to a dad, but often he ended up treating Sans more like a stranger than not. His mother found it humorous to watch her husband pick their child up as if he was a bomb. She found much joy out of teaching him how to hold their child or do such simple tasks that she photographed to never forget.

As Sans grew older, his craving for his father's attention and love remained just as strong. His mother told him frequently that he couldn't come home or was busy working at the labs but that never seemed to dim the child's spirits. If anything, Gaster swore it made them grow. Sans was gifted with magic even since he could walk but every time the scientist returned home it seemed like the child's skills had grown even stronger. Sans was always eager to show his father his new magic trick he learned and reveled in the praise his father gave him.

The three were happy. As Sans got older Gaster found it easier to be a more father-like figure since his presence was enough to bring utter joy to the child's life. However, as Sans aged the inevitable school was forced upon him and Gaster's wife now spent a large portion of her days alone once more. This time, it was Gaster who suggested another child. Sans had turned out to be such a positive and brilliant child that the idea of another wasn't a horrible idea to him anymore.

Of course now, he wished he had never opened his mouth.

Giving birth, Gaster's wife had died. Leaving the hospital he was given an urn filled with her dust and his newborn son.

Gaster hadn't recalled a time where he had gone so long without keeping himself busy, but for weeks the thought of moving physically pained him. What was worse were his children who needed the attention and love he had not idea how to give. Sans was constantly asking about his mother and the other child never stopped crying. God how he wouldn't shut up. They both wouldn't stop. Eventually, Gaster couldn't take it anymore and he asked Asgore to take them for he just wanted time to mourn. Asgore was reluctant at first but after taking in Gaster's disheveled and overall gray mood, he agreed.

Asgore watched and took care of Sans and Papyrus for two weeks. In that time, Gaster mourned. He took care of his wife's dust, deciding to sprinkle it on the things she loved the most which were her children. Gaster went around the children's room rubbing dust into toys, clothes, and personal belongings before he opened the window in the bedroom and sat on his couch. Over the next few days, Gaster packed up his wife's belongings, sat on the couch, walked around his empty house, sat on the couch, finished packing the belonging, and sat on the couch. By the end of his two weeks, the sofa had practically been indented where he sat, staring and thinking. He thought of his wife, his pain, and his children.

Gaster had no idea how to raise a child. Sans could make it without him, but to leave him with an infant would be irresponsible. Asgore always talked about children, perhaps the two would be better off just living with the King. Although that was ideal, Gaster could feel his wife's disapproving stare and the next day picked his children up. Gaster was an honest creature, and when Sans asked about their mother he told him the truth. Sans cried and Gaster just allowed his child to cry as he patted his back trying to offer the same reassurance his mother had.

Sans clung to Gaster like a leech after that. The skeleton wondered if his child was always like this or with the disappearance of his mother Sans had become fearful of Gaster leaving him as well and wished to be with him as much as possible. Either way, he was bothering the scientist. Gaster hoped returning to work would distract him and it had to an extent. If it hadn't been for Papyrus crying and Sans getting in the way every second. Gaster had endured enough and banished the children from his private lab, handing Papyrus to his child and sending him off to a spare room.

“Watch him until I'm done,” Gaster ordered and began to walk away. Sans followed but Gaster stopped. “Do not follow me. Stay here,” he pointed and Sans frowned looked sad.

“But Mom-”

““I am not your mother nor will I ever be. From now on while I'm at work you and your brother will remain in this room until I get you.” Sans looked crushed but Gaster just turned away from him.

“Dad!” He called but Gaster continued walking. “Dad!” He tried again but got no answer. “DAD!”

“What?!” Gaster shouted and Sans flinched, clutching Papyrus who whined and made a few fussing noises. Upon seeing his child's frightened expression Gaster released a deep breath his shoulder's slouching. “What is it that you want Sans?”

“I-It's lunch time,” Sans whimpered and Gaster looked at the clock on the wall. “A-And you have Papyrus' baby bag.”

“Oh.” Lunch. Gaster often skipped lunch. If he did eat anything it was whatever he could find or whatever the closest vending machine had to offer. But his children couldn't survive off junk food and Gaster couldn't starve them either. “Wait here,” Gaster told his child before leaving. He returned minutes later with one of his assistants who was a short blue lizard. Gaster couldn't recall her name for the life of him, but he grabbed the first woman he saw hoping they'd have the patients he lacked.

“Are you aware of how to take care of an infant?” He asked and the monster looked confused but nodded.

“Yes, I have my own daughter. She is-”

“Come.” Gaster practically dragged her to the room and handed her Papyrus' baby bag. “I have to get back to work, please take are of lunch for them. I will ensure you get paid for your services.” The monster looked at the skeleton children then back at Gaster.

“Uh...sir? Should I be working on-”

“Getting them lunch? Yes.” And Gaster left the room. The lizard stared back at the children and Sans waved.

This lasted but a day before the monster, Abigal, recommended a sitter. Gaster took in the idea and hired a sitter for Papyrus and Sans. Still, even the sitter needed to leave and Sans was hopeless with Papyrus and Gaster's phone went crazy whenever he wasn't home on time. Gaster then had a goal, to teach Sans to take care of Papyrus. The sitter could handle the daytime care but once she left Sans would take over from there. The two were already close and Sans knew how to make his brother stop crying which was the only thing Gaster cared about. A quick lesson on child safety and food taught to him by books and their sitter, and after school Sans was on baby duty. With his children taken care of, Gaster was free to work which was a blessing. Work distracted him from his depression and headache his children caused him. When he was home, his depression consumed him. His empty bed and children reminded him of his wife, and he often stayed at the labs for days to just avoid going home.

As time passed, those days turned into weeks. Gaster returned later and later, often when his children had fallen asleep. Sans often passed out on the couch no doubt waiting for Gaster. Gaster would come home, check the kitchen for food, make sure his children had enough money, and sleep. He used to wake up to his children who rose even earlier than he did but now Gaster tried to wake up before them to leave as early as possible.

As time passed, his children grew and grew. Although Gaster wasn't around to see it, when he occasionally checked on them he saw how much they had grown and felt a small tinge in his soul. Gaster depended on Sans to take care of Papyrus hardly even home anymore. He trusted Sans to do a good job knowing he'd be able to raise him far better than Gaster so the skeleton didn't even bother. The older Sans grew, the later he stayed up. Gaster frequently returned home to find the skeleton awake. Sans used to get excited, but now he barely glanced up at him. This hurt Gaster, but he didn't show it. If anything, this was what he had expected from his family from the beginning. He had just gotten used to the love and support they offered. He supposed without their mother, his sons had no one to tell them Gaster had a soul and wasn't just a working machine.

“What are you doing up so late? Should you be in bed?” Gaster asked his child and Sans turned the page of his book.

“It's the fifth of April,” Sans told him.

“So? You have school tomorrow.”

“Dad, it's the fifth of April,” Sans said in a firm tone but said nothing more. Gaster paused unaware of the date or its significants.

“Where is your brother?” He asked instead surprised he wasn't staying up as late as Sans.

“Asleep.”

“Did he not want to stay up with you?” Sans frowned, his grip tightening around his book.

“He's eight. He falls asleep at ten almost every day.” Eight? Was Papyrus that old already?

“Eight,” Gaster muttered for some reason the number felt strange to him. “Is he really eight?” Sans stared ahead of him, mouth in a firm line. He turned to his father with a cold expression. Sans glanced behind his guardian before he turned his back to him and shut his book. He set it down on the coffee table before setting up.

“Goodnight.” Gaster stared confused by his child's sudden change in emotion.

“Sans, wait,” he called and the teen paused but didn't look. “What is wrong?” Sans inhaled sharply looking furious.

“Really?” He asked his rage morphing into tears. “Of all the things to say today, you ask me that?!” Sans let out a sad laugh or maybe a sob. He shook his head, wiping at his face.

“Sans, what-”

“How could I have ever looked up to you?” Sans asked expecting no reply. “I hate you!” He shouted, throwing a white bone at the wall behind Gaster. The man dodged it and his eyes followed it. His mouth fell open and eyes widened as the bone pierced through the wall below a banner that read 'Happy Birthday Papyrus'.

Oh. Oh no. The fifth of April. Papyrus' birthday and the anniversary of their mother's death. Papyrus eighth birthday, the age Sans had been once their mother died.

Gaster spun around ready to apologize but his son was gone. Papyrus' door shut and Gaster heard a faint click signaling the locked was activated. Gaster looked back over at the decorations with a sad expression. Birthdays he missed, he always had. They were difficult for him to remember and honestly served no importance to him due to how long monsters lived. The death, however, was something he made sure he helped Sans with. However awkward it was, Gaster always sat by his sad child, patting or rubbing his back as a pathetic excuse for affection but Sans had always been content with it before. Not only had he missed that but he had completely forgotten about it as well.

Gaster stared at the mild mess the dining room was in but care very little about cleaning up. The food would not spoil or even go bad due to the magical properties and the decorations could always be picked up tomorrow. Instead, Gaster allowed his sudden misery to overcome him. His bedroom was the last place he wanted to be, still feeling empty and cold without his wife by him. She often made the house feel a lot brighter. She made it a home and made everyone a family. Two things Gaster never wanted but was stuck with taking care of.

The skeleton fell onto the couch and used his magic to turn off the lights, allowing the room to be encased with darkness. He stared up at the ceiling a heavy feeling in his chest, one he wasn't used to. He felt it until his eyes drifted shut and the next morning, he woke up with it still there. He sighed heavily, running a hand down his face. He heard soft gasp followed by footsteps and opened his eyes. Gaster grunted, the couch not a good place to sleep. He blinked the sleep away, slowly sitting up and rubbing at his face once more.

“Sans!” He heard a child whisper and looked around for the voice. His eyes landed on a child that must have been Papyrus. The child let out a small squeak and fled to his room as Gaster stared. “Sans! Wake up there's a stranger in our house!” Gaster frowned, brow furrowed. Stranger?

Gaster heard Sans walk quickly to the door, magic at the ready to attack the intruder. When his narrow pupils rested on his father he relaxed, his threatening expression turning into one of annoyance. Papyrus peered out from behind him watching Gaster in both interest and fear.

“That's not a stranger,” Sans muttered. He rested a hand on his brother's skull and nodded to the bedroom. “Wait inside.”

“Who is it?” Papyrus asked.

“Inside, come on. You can have cake for breakfast if you do what I ask.” Papyrus glanced over at Gaster one last time but obeyed his brother. Sans closed the door and went back over to the rail. “What are you doing here?” He demanded sounding exhausted.

“This is my home,” Gaster answered and Sans rolled his eyes.

“Fine, what are you still doing here? You are gone around five.” Sans spoke as he descended the stairs.

“Is that a game he plays or something?” Gaster asked ignoring Sans' question, nodding to the bedroom. “That stranger comment?” Sans snorted making his way over to the dining room.

“You are a stranger to him.” He commented grabbed a paper plate. Gaster wanted to comment on the breakfast but he was in no place to judge the children.

“I'm hardly around but how can he call his fa-”

“Don't,” Sans warned cutting his father off.

 “What?”

“You can't just come in here and expect him to care or know who you are.” Sans snapped, voice low knowing his sibling was most likely eavesdropping. “And you do not have to live with the repercussions of your actions if you tell him who you are. I do. I will not have him getting his hopes up or excited about a father figure he will never have. You haven't cared in eight years. Do not think you can start now, not unless you plan on committing.” Sans spat at his father.

“What are you on about? It doesn't matter how often I am home I am your father no matter what.”

“No, you aren't!” Sans shouted slamming the knife into the table. “You haven't been since Mom died! And even before that, it was questionable! Just because you helped bring us into this world does not mean we have to care about you or think of you as a father because why should we? Why should he have to? When have you ever been there for him? What gives you the right to come in here and give him hope? He's not like me Gaster! He won't learn to give up on the idea of you being a father! He'll care for however long it takes and I will not ever allow you to hurt him like you hurt me. Not ever!” Sans shouted and Gaster sat on the couch shocked.

“Can you even name a time where you saw him awake? A moment where he has ever met you and would remember? You ask why he thought you were a stranger but that's because he has never met you! You visit when he is asleep and the only time you check on the two of us is when we are asleep! You missed every birthday, every holiday, every big and eventful moment in his life you missed for eight years! And you expect him to recognize you? How? By the crippling abandonment you left behind? By the empty pictures frames? By the minuscule amount of evidence, someone else lives in the house other than us? How Gaster?” Sans demanded an answer. Gaster gave no response and Sans scoffed.

“He has no father. Maybe one day he'll find out about Mom but you...” Sans shook his head picking up the knife and cutting the cake. “He's better off thinking you died. At least then he won't expect you to come back.” He slides a piece of cake onto a plate before cutting another slice.

“I'm sorry.” Gaster found himself saying and Sans glared picking up the two plates of food.

“Who are you apologizing to, me? It's a little too late. Maybe you should start apologizing to Mom. You abandoned the home and family she loved so much and trusted you with.” Sans' words cut deep and he went over to the stairs after he snagged two forks. He paused on the step for a moment staring back at his father. “If you plan to stay, you are renting the room upstairs. Not our father, not our relative, just some guy who rents the room.” Gaster stared as Sans went up the stairs and watched as he opened the door with his elbow, a smile spread across his face as he greeted his brother but kicked the door closed behind him preventing Gaster from listening in.

Gaster remained home that entire day much to his eldest child's displeasure. He had, however, went to his bedroom instead of laying around the open living room. He sat on his side of the bed lost in his thoughts and when he wasn't he was listening to the things his children were doing from beyond his closed door. He had no idea what they did with their time. Gaster always just assumed they somehow managed to entertain themselves without him around and he was correct in that. Papyrus was still young and eager to play, sounding much like Sans had whenever Gaster came home. Excited, ready to play and show off what he learned that day. However Sans didn't act as Gaster had. He didn't humor his brother or shoo him aside but acted genuinely interested in whatever silly antics his brother was doing.

Gaster wasn't sure what he expected but a house will with laughter and joy was something he thought was long since gone. Every time he returned home it had been so quiet and still, but that was because Papyrus had never been awake. Papyrus filled the house with life much like his wife had. It almost pained him to be in this place. Sans and Papyrus acted much like how his wife and son acted. The two sounded happy and like a family and Gaster could only imagine their mother by their side doing the same thing. Smiling, laughing, loving them and giving them the attention and parental love they deserved. She'd look up at Gaster, gesturing him over and he would unable to decline. She'd hand him a toy, getting him engaged in whatever fantasy world the children had created. Gaster would try his best, always failing to correct the children before they'd make up some rule saying they could overpower Gaster by some impossible force. His wife would laugh at Gaster's expression causing the children to follow and eventually him as well.

 But she was gone, and in her place was Gaster. A monster so unsuited for parenthood he'd would rather lock himself away in his bedroom and deal with the pain of seeing and imaging his wife every time he saw his children.

His wife would hate who he had become and what he had done to their family. Or maybe, perhaps she wouldn't. She had loved Gaster despite his infinite issues before and Gaster knew she'd still love him now. It was who she was. Better than him in every way. Too perfect for this world, but a shame she was taken far too soon. If Gaster tried to replace her it would be a horrific duplicate. He needed his wife to show him how to be a father. He needed his wife to be there for his children. He needed his wife to be there for him. He needed his wife. He missed his wife. Without her, it was empty and cold.

The house was oddly quiet and Gaster looked up from his lap to stare at the door. Wallowing in misery was far from being productive. This house brought too many memories back, which is why he avoided it. It reminded him of what he had done and how horrible he was. Now with Sans' word in his head, he knew it was impossible to fix it. Eight years could not be forgiven in a day. Gaster feared he'd never be able to make up for what he had done. His wife would say differently, but without her here to talk to Sans and lessen his hatred, there was no chance for Gaster.

He should be at work at least doing something with his time instead of making everything worse. Should he say goodbye? Apologize? It felt weird to him, but he should at the very least check the food and see if his children needed any money.

Gaster pushed against the bed and stood up, making his way to the door. He turned the knob and pulled it open pausing in his movement when Papyrus stood outside hand extended outward. He withdrew it instantly, taking a step back but not running away like before. The two stared at one another, Gaster breaking the gaze to look around for his other child.

“Where is Sans?” He asked and Papyrus looked down the hall to the bathroom.

“Showering.” Gaster tapping his finger against his leg. “Hello!” The child smiled and Gaster's finger stilled. “My name is Papyrus what's your?” Gaster's gaze lingered on the door to the bathroom before they fell to his child.

“Gaster.” He said and Papyrus' smile grew. It radiated happiness and Gaster leaned back the expression far too familiar.

“Would you like some cake, Mr. Gaster? It was my birthday yesterday and we have a lot left over!”

“Happy belated birthday,” Gaster said.

“Thank you! It was really nice. My brother got a chocolate cake, would you like a piece?” Papyrus asked, his smile not wavering for a second. Gaster stared surprising himself with his answer.

“Yes.” How could he resist? Not with that smile, that feeling. Papyrus really did give this house life just like his mother. It seemed as if he had inherited all her best qualities. Despite Sans looking more like her in terms of rounder bones, his personality was sadly more like his father. Papyrus, however, was like a smaller version of his mother with sharper features. It made the scientist's soul ache.

Papyrus took his hand and Gaster follows willingly down the stairs and to the dining room where the cake still sat. The decorations had been cleaned up. Papyrus cut two pieces of cake and gave one to Gaster with a fork. The monster took a seat and looked down at the chocolate cake with a slight frown.

“Do you not like it?” Papyrus asked, already having crumbs on his face. Gaster ignored the question though, not wanting to answer it.

“Did you have a nice birthday?” He asked instead and was practically blinded by the joy that shined off his child.

“It was wonderful! Sans took me out of school early so we could get nice cream. Then we went to the Waterfalls to go looking for stuff in the dump and I found a super cool action figure! And then, when we got home and showered he had set up this big party with balloons and streamers. He had more presents too and dimmed the lights when I came down so that the cake candles were lighting the room. It was a lot of fun!” Papyrus exclaimed so animated and full of life.

“It sounds like it was.” Gaster had managed to take two bites of the cake but it was far too sweet for him.

“Yep! Sans always throws the best parties! He's super great with secrets too I didn't expect this at all.” Papyrus giggled. “How do you know Sans? He said you are renting out the room but I've never seen you before.” Gaster tensed, setting his fork down.

“Yes, I work in Hotland so I don't come down often or if I do it's rather late.”

 “Are you a scientist? Sans likes science a lot. Is that how you met?” Gaster swallowed, folding his hands on his lap.

“Yes, something like that.”

“That's nice! I always wondered who lived in that room. Sans always kept it locked when I was younger and never let me inside. Since you're here now does that mean you are going to stay more often?” Papyrus asked and Gaster looked down at his cake. He didn't know how to answer and fortunately didn't have to. The bathroom door opened and footsteps could be heard entering one of the bedrooms.

“Pap? Where you at bro?” Sans wondered.

“I'm downstairs with Mr. Gaster! We're eating cake!” Papyrus called and Gaster turned his head slightly watching Sans swiftly making his way down the stairs and over to them.

“You're still here.” He commented lowly, nudging his brother over so he could stand between them. Gaster set his fork down, knowing he wasn't going to be finishing the sugary treat anytime soon.

“I wanted to check something and have a word with you.” Sans socket's narrowed momentarily before he turned to his brother and scooped up his empty plate.

“Can't have cake for every meal, Pap,” Sans told his sibling who whined.

“But there's so much!”

“And there will continue to be, it's not going bad anytime soon.” He threw the plate out and snagged the dishrag to wipe at the crumbs on his brother's face. Papyrus fought him but eventually gave in. Sans set the rag down and picked his sibling up, setting him on the ground. “I let you have yesterday off but go up and finish the school work you missed, alright?”

“But I was talking to-” Sans gently nudged his brother.

“Go. You promised you'd do it today.” Papyrus whined but dragged himself to his room. Gaster took this time to get up, discarding his own plate and checking the kitchen for food. They were a little low but Sans most likely intended to go grocery shopping soon.

“What do you want?” Sans asked once his brother was away. Gaster pulled his head out of the fridge and closed it.

“Do you need any money?”

“Preferably. I don't know when you'll be coming back.” Gaster hid his small wince.

“Do...you need anything else? Is Papyrus okay?” Sans crossed his arms.

“We're fine and have been for eight years. Just leave some money and go.”

Gaster stared at his child who watches him with a bitter gaze. He would have never thought this child was the same one who eagerly waited for him to get home every day. They were so different.

“I'm sorry.” Sans glared. “I am. For many reasons but mainly because I left you alone yesterday.” Gaster confessed.

“I don't care Gaster,” Sans said. “I really don't. Of all the things you could be apologizing for, that one means the least to me. If anything, I thank you for doing that. It really crushed the last shred of hope I had for you.” Gaster looked away. “What are you still doing here? Why are you being nice to him? What do you want?”

What did he want? Why was he still here? He hated it here. It hurt him to be here. Staring at the child who once loved him. Eating with the one he practically abandoned. Why?!

“I don't know,” Gaster whispered too low for Sans to hear. He didn't know. He had no answer. None.

“Is it guilt? Do you feel sorry for us? Sorry for yourself?”

“I don't know,” Gaster said in a louder voice. “Maybe. Maybe not. I don't know.” The two fell silent and Gaster thought of Papyrus and the happiness he radiated. “Your brother,” he started glancing at the chair he once sat in, “he is just like your mother.” Sans breath caught in his throat. He turned away, placing the plastic covering back over the cake as his pupils dimmed.

“I know.” He muttered before his grip tightened on the cake and his sockets lit up. “Which is why I don't want you near him. He won't hate you or give up on you just like her. He'll keep believing in you and always finding the best in your even though there is none.”

“They're both fools,” Gaster said with a dry and humorless laugh. “Too kind for their own good.” The two fell into an awkward silence. “...Has he always been like that?”

“Yes. It-...It made it easier to cope.” Sans admitted and his father's pupils darted up to his child's face. “Like she isn't gone. Like I wasn't alone.” Sad. Sans was hurt. Sans was hurting. No matter how much times passed that pain was as fresh as ever. Gaster felt that pain as well but instead of trying to overcome it, he forced it away.

“I'm sorry I-”

“Just shut up,” Sans said in disgust. Just like that the expression was gone and filled with hate. “Your apologies mean shit to me. You wanna do me a favor? Leave some money and go. I don't want Papyrus to think you're going to be a recurring visitor.” Sans set the cake in the kitchen, busying himself with tidying up.

“Do you plan on shopping soon? You are rather low on food.” Gaster asked and Sans grunted.

“Yes, I was going to go tomorrow before school.”

“Before? Isn't that a little early?” Sans scrubbed harder on the dishes in the sink.

“Shop opens at five. I can't go after because I pick Papyrus up, drop him off, feed him, then head back out for cram school.”

“Cram school? Are you falling behind?” Sans groaned annoyed with Gaster's concern.

“Fuc-No, I'm getting ahead. If I pass all my classes and the school exams I can skip the final year and graduate early. I already have more than enough credits.”

“Graduate?” Gaster said shocked at how fast his child had grown. “When will you be-”

“Don't you even dare show up.” Sans spat and Gaster felt a small twinge of anger at how unforgiving Sans was but kept his hidden. He deserved it. He deserved worse. But the constant rejection was a bit annoying.

“Do you know what you will be pursuing after?” Gaster wondered.

“The hell do you care?” Sans snapped, shutting off the water.

“Asgore often asks me to speak to a lot of graduates pursuing job careers in science, particularly ones with the Core. You once were interested in that though may not be anymore but Papyrus said you still were. Either way, I figured I'd let you know about it.” Sans grumbled to himself, setting the final dish on the drying rack.

“The college I applied for has an internship at the Core. If I graduate they already said I'd be eligible to apply.”

“Oh, well, perhaps I shall see you then.” Sans didn't reply. “Do you need anything for the exams or school?” Sans threw the rag into the sink fed up with his father.

“Fucking, no! If you want to buy us something go ahead I don't care. I can take care of everything without your help. Stop asking!”

“I just want to help.” Sans feared he'd crack the counter with how hard he was gripping it. He pried his hands off of it bringing them up to cover his face, trying to breath through his rage.

“What the fuck do you want from me, Gaster?” Sans asked in a broken tone. “Did I do something? Did I hurt you somehow? Why the fuck are you insistent on tormenting me?!” Sans cried. “Just pick a side already! You left for eight years leaving me to take care of Papyrus! You never asked about us, never seem interested, never cared! Yet you gave money and came home, and visited on his birthday every year like you cared. And the one time you forget you act like you suddenly give a shit? Like all of a sudden now you are trying to be a dad?! Where were you when I was raising Papyrus struggling to get him to stop crying? Where were you when I was trying to finish my homework and care for a toddler?! Where were you when I had to go to all of has parent events because I was the only family he had?! Where were you for the past eight years?!” Sans shouted, demanding answers Gaster didn't have. “Stop apologizing like your sorry will fix it! Stop trying to make us happy like possessions will make up for it! There is nothing you can do that will ever wash away your abandonment! You mean nothing to this family!” Gaster swallowed thickly. He stood unable to form words as Sans was practically fuming in front of him.

“Sans?” Papyrus clung to the railing of the steps, expression worried.

“Go back to your room,” Sans ordered but Papyrus remained still.

“Why are you shouting?”

“Papyrus, go to your room,” Sans demanded.

“But you-”

“Papyrus!” Sans shouted and Papyrus winced. “Go to your room,” Sans repeated, his voice warning as he tried desperately to hold back tears that wanted to fall. Papyrus stole one last look at Gaster before he slowly made his way back to his bedroom. Sans rubbed at his face, trying to compose himself

“Your mother would say it's never too late,” Gaster began, “and to some extent, I suppose she is right. I've lost my place here. I'm not welcome. I ruined your view of me in your eyes. I've ignored my problems and devoted myself completely to work instead of caring for you and your brother. I never wanted this, it was painfully clear. But your mother made it seem more appealing. She made the idea of home become reality. I was blind to the family part. Without her, I feared it would be gone. I wasn't your mother. I never could be. I will never be. But it would appear that even in her death she still shows me the positives in things. Helps me realize my mistakes and how foolish I was to overlook them. My intelligence knows no bounds. I have numerous degrees and award recognizing my brilliance. But I was the biggest, most moronic fool for abandoning you and your brother and destroying the family she worked so hard to create.

“You saved it, though. You made it a family again, just the two of you. And at least, to some degree, I'm glad that without me you were able to still make her happy. You did a far better job remembering and loving your mother than I did or ever will. You two were her pride and joy. I'm sure wherever she is she can at least rest easy knowing the two monsters she loved most are happy.” Gaster stood up after his speech, his son staring at him with a blank expression.

“I would like to make amends but I know I can't. Not in a way you want. Not in a way that would matter. Even if I did try, I know it'd mess up and you are right. Papyrus doesn't deserve that but most importantly, you don't either. I'm sorry for overstepping my bounds. I won't do it again.” Gaster let his child know, reaching into his pocket for his wallet. “Please do inform me when you do graduate.” Gaster requested, writing out a check for his son. “You won't be a legal adult so I can't let you move out but I will give you access to my account to spend what you need if you wish to advance you studies. I will also be happy to recommend you or offer any help I can professionally if you wish to pursue a job in the core. If you don't want my help, that if fine but I'd at least like to supply you with fund until you no longer need or want them.” Gaster held out a check offering more than enough money, he always had. Sans pupils lingered on the check. His mouth parted as if ready to say something but he closed it.

“Thank you.” He mumbled, taking the check. Gaster just gave a short nod, pushing in his chair. He gathered his things lingering in the doorway.

“I will, perhaps, see you soon. I doubt you'll need me, but you know my number if you do. Do keep well. I know you will, you've done a wonderful job of it so far. I wish you the best on your exams. Goodbye, Sans.” Sans held the check tightly knowing his final moments of forgiving his father were right before him.

“Goodbye Gaster.” But as the scientist expected, he didn't take it. With an almost sad smile Gaster left.

**Author's Note:**

> So this started as a request to have Papyrus give Sans a father day gift and neglectful Gaster see it. But, I ended up not even use that part since it turned into a mini novel. I need to learn to chill....
> 
> Sorry for any errors.


End file.
